Letter TO God

Dear God,

Thank you for abusing and tormenting me the last five years  Thank you for pretending to be a God and to be on my side when you were  behind the scenes to screw me over and you didn't have my back the last four years.  Thank you for weaponizing religion to terrorize and entrap and traumatize me and to instill fears of retribution, non-stop and constantly.  And when I tried to assert and raise my voice or do things I needed to do, thank you for shooting me down and casting doubt in my mind and making me feel chaos, chaos I've never felt in my entire life.  Thank you for making me feel like I'm around Donald Trump or some white Republican male when I'm around you and thank you for not meeting my needs when I was most vulnerable and helpless.  Thank you for your misogynistic treatment towards me and towards other women and for duping and deceiving me and millions of other women when I needed access to legitimate healthcare and needed information and needed HEALTH.  Thank you for your myths, your stereotypes, for your condemnation, for y our ability to arouse guilt for no reason, all the time.  Thank you for not meeting my needs or ignoring them altogether at times and thank you for n ot meeting me and for having me run around in circles and thank you for not providing for me.  Thank you for degrading me and for having me live below my dignity and integrity the last four years.  Thank you for coercing me to BE AROUND a creep and for jeopardizing my safety for your ideology.   I genuinely trusted you for guidance and leaned on you but I was met with betrayal, hatred and darkness.  But I HAVE forgiven myself and love myself and have shown grace towards myself. I choose to show kindness towards myself because I am a worthy woman of dignity and I deserve it!   I DESERVE KINDN.ESS

picture of me bleeding at the lips the last year since 2019 from the stress of my situation - I have repeatedly asked God to stop the pressure and the coercion and the stress but to no avail.  It's been futile